These bidet attachments are the budget-friendly butt spas we all need

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By StackCommerceMashable Shopping2020-03-03 14:11:35 UTC

Everybody poops. You, me, the president, the queen, and *gasp*, even Beyoncé. It’s just a fact of life. But not everybody cleans up after in the same way. You could use baby wipes, but flushing them will clog your septic system and create a horrific mountain of waste. Or you could just use regular ol’ toilet paper, but it can be irritating, leave a residue, and even cause infections. Neither is a great option, yet they’re the ones most of us settle for.

Luckily, there’s a third option: a bidet. For the uninitiated, a bidet is like a miniature shower for your bum. Yes, it is as weird and wonderful as it sounds. But, sadly, bidets are also very expensive.

On the plus side, we’ve found some budget-friendly bidet attachments and seats that are just like those extravagant butt spas, but without the price tag. They’ll rinse away the waste and leave you feeling clean, powerful, and ready to conquer the world. What roll of toilet paper has ever done that?

Here are five bidet accessories on sale:

SlimGlow bidet attachment with night light

Just as its name suggests, the SlimGlow is sleek and slim (50 percent thinner than competing products) and features a glowing blue night light. It’s super easy to install and requires no electricity, no wires, and no extra plumbing. It also features a dual nozzle, an incline to complement your natural position, and a comfort grip pressure control knob to control your clean. Usually retailing for $79, the SlimGlow is on sale for just $49.99.

Alpha One V2 Bidet Seat

If you’d rather your bidet be incorporated into your seat (and a bit more hidden), the Alpha One V2 is a simple solution. It offers both front and rear natural water cleansing with retractable self-cleaning dual nozzles. And, of course, there’s also a blue LED light for nighttime guidance. It’s usually $199, but you can get it on sale for $72.99.

Alpha GX Wave Bidet Seat

A step up from the V2, the Alpha GX Wave includes three wash modes, a warm air dryer, and a soft white LED light to illuminate your experience. It also boasts a low profile design, front and rear natural water cleansing, and an easy-to-use side control panel. Plus, at just $199.99 (regularly $399), it’s quite the steal.

Alpha IX Hybrid Bidet Seat with Remote

Dubbed Amazon’s Choice bidet seat, with a 4.2-star rating, the IX Hybrid is the most advanced of the Alpha models. It features four different wash modes with various water temperatures and pressure intensities, a glowing blue LED nightlight to light your way at night, a hybrid heating system that provides unlimited warm water, and a wireless remote to control all the features. Of course, there’s also a drying mode to send you on your way. Usually, the Alpha IX Hybrid retails for $499, but you can scoop it on sale for just $219.99.

Brondell Swash 1400 Luxury Bidet Toilet Seat

Experienced bidet users and those with money to burn will appreciate the Brondell Swash 1400 Luxury Bidet Toilet Seat, which is loaded with features like a heated seat, warm air dryer, nozzle oscillation, and deodorizer. Plus, there’s a one-touch auto mode, programmable user settings (so your toilet time can be personalized), and a blue light to illuminate the experience. Get it for $649 and join the wash-don’t-wipe revolution.