Sorry, Jeff Bezos is not a ‘style icon’

Not content to merely fetishize the tech-rich for their obscene wealth, we’ve apparently moved on to raising them to the level of icon. And not just any kind of icon, but style icon. Or, at least the New York Times has, anyway. 

In a dubiously premised piece published today titled “Jeff Bezos, Style Icon,” the Times Style section makes the case that the Amazon CEO and one-time richest person in modern history has transcended the status of mere mortal when it comes to his Dad-life ensemble. 

To wit: “The ascension, unavoidable when this sort of spotlight falls on you, of Jeff Bezos, a.k.a., the richest man in the world, to full-fledged style icon. You can’t ignore it anymore.”

The piece argues that, as demonstrated by his “willingness to sample outfits, much as he samples industries,” the once khaki-wearing dweeb has become a power-vest strutting macho man setting the standard for chic. 

And it’s apparently not just Bezos’s clothes that have grabbed the Times’s eye, but his entire look. 

“There he is, for example,” the article manages to continue, “arm veins a-popping, next to a poster of the even balder and more built Dwayne Johnson in Rampage, with the caption: ‘Still working on my smolder.'”

As evidence of this total style dominance, the piece includes a selection of photographs taken from Getty and the Associated Press showing the man in question sporting all kinds of suits and jackets. Well, we can use Getty too, and our quick search suggested a different reality, one in which a rich guy dresses the same way he treats his workers: like shit.

I mean, just look at those cargo shorts.

Let us not forget the generation-defining baseball cap. And we would certainly be remiss to overlook the iconic shoes.

What sartorial joie de vivre that man has. 

But the so-pure-I’d-mainline-it sense of fashion is not limited to his kicks. Check out this vest. 

I don’t know how you manage to one-up style icons like Audrey Hepburn and Joey Ramone at the same time, but this man and his vest surely just did. 

Turning away from Getty to an area where Bezos has complete control over how he is represented, his Instagram account, we find more of the same questionable wardrobe choices. Like, for example, this iconically stylish Patagonia fleece.

Or this graphic tee which, as the Times clearly imagines it, is no longer solely reserved for tools.

Thanks for clearing that up, New York Times Style section! 

But, alas, there are still some Bezos doubters out there — including, strangely enough, in the halls of the Times itself. 

The Times Fashion Twitter account, for example, isn’t entirely convinced that Bezos’s look is ready to define a generation. 

But even if not rising to the level of “style icon,” which Bezos definitely does not, maybe in the end he does deserve a bit of practical credit for his cargo-short style. After all, it’s difficult to break a strike while wearing a tux.