Technology
I, Jeff Bezos, am a big boy with a big truck. VROOOOM!
I, Jeff Bezos, super rich adult man and definite Big Boy, like trucks! And construction equipment! And moving dirt! VROOOOOOM! BEEP BEEP!
But you already know this! I told you so! When, yesterday, I hopped into a large front loader (can you believe they let me do this stuff?!) and, in front of a bunch of cameras, picked up some dirt and then DUMPED IT right back onto the same spot!
We’re investing $1.5 billion in our new air hub to get you your packages faster. Three million square feet, and it’s going to create 2,000 jobs. And if you’re guessing that driving a front loader was fun, you’re right! #amazon #prime pic.twitter.com/Cud4orKrC4
— Jeff Bezos (@JeffBezos) May 14, 2019
Like, WOW, right?! Was it necessary in any way?! No! Was it fun?! YOU’D BETTER BELIEVE IT!
“If you’re wondering,” I told the cheering crowd watching me play with my Big Boy toy at the Cincinnati/Northern Kentucky International Airport, “that’s fun!”
But why am I being so silly?! Of course you were wondering! AND IT’S OBVIOUSLY FUN!
You’re also definitely curious about my plans for the $1.5 billion air hub I’m having built! Which is obviously why I dumped the dirt, goofballs! The hub will “get you your packages faster[!],” and is scheduled to open sometime in 2021! It will have planes! Planes are like SKY TRUCKS!
VROOM VROOM! BEEP BEEP!
Now excuse me while I go play with my SPACE TOYS! RAAAAAAARRRRRR! BLAST OFF!
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