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The 16 most ridiculous teen dramas to stream during social distancing

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Nothing says “ten hours on the couch” like teen melodrama. 

Whether you’ve indulged in every adolescent soap opera under the sun or just a few (read: 20) episodes of Riverdale, there’s always room in your binge for more high school madness. 

It can be mundane: “Donna LaDonna said what about Carrie?” It can be serious: “Who murdered Bryce Walker?” It can even be downright batshit: “Was ‘Mad World’ really the right song for Betty’s Southside Serpent strip tease for Jughead? Or should she have picked Radiohead’s ‘Creep’??”

In our humble opinion, the more ridiculous the better. So, for your convenience, here are 16 of the silliest teen dramas now streaming ranked from least to most chaotic — you know, just in case you need a distraction while social distancing.

"People who wait for the right moment end up waiting forever."

“People who wait for the right moment end up waiting forever.”

For those of us who can’t seem to let Sex and the City go, there’s The Carrie Diaries. A prequel to HBO’s mega hit, this ’80s-set series follows an adolescent Carrie Bradshaw to her home in  Castlebury, Connecticut. She’s got great friends, a smoking love interest, and dreams of being a famous writer in New York City. [Sniffles.] Our little girl grew up so darn fast! 

How to watch: The Carrie Diaries Seasons 1-2 are now streaming on CW Seed.

"I believe in controlling everything."

“I believe in controlling everything.”

One of the most underrated Amy Sherman-Palladino shows on the market, Bunheads has it all: teens struggling with teen stuff, Sutton Foster as a widowed ex-showgirl-turned-dance instructor, and Kelly Bishop playing a woman named “Fanny Flowers” completely deadpan. Paradise Dance Academy is indeed paradise — if only for 18 blissful episodes.

How to watch: Bunheads Season 1 is now streaming on Hulu.

Oh hello, Marshmallows.

Oh hello, Marshmallows.

As a kid in 2004, it was hard to feel like you were achieving much of anything without your own private detective agency. Luckily, watching Veronica Mars made up for it. Told in standalone episodes as part of a bigger mystery, this teen noir tale is perfect for when you want to watch an adolescent girl kick ass, take names, and wade through her many suitors. You suck, crime! 

How to watch: Veronica Mars Seasons 1-4 are now streaming on Hulu.

The 16 most ridiculous teen dramas to get wrapped up in during social distancing

As far as escapism goes, it’s hard to think of a more ideal destination than The O.C., with its scenic views, lavish mansions, witty dialogue, and ridiculously attractive, scantily clad, mostly 20something “teens” making out and punching each other on the beach. Ben McKenzie’s Ryan Atwood serves as our audience surrogate, offering an appropriately bewildered outside view into the strange but enviable lifestyles of the rich and not-quite-famous. — Angie Han, Deputy Entertainment Editor 

How to watch: The O.C. Seasons 1-4 are now streaming on Hulu

Clear eyes, full hearts <3

Clear eyes, full hearts <3

Friday Night Lights may not rank as highly as some of the other shows on this list in terms of sheer ridiculousness (the disastrous murder plotline in Season 2 aside), but it’ll suck you in just the same. Come for intense teen dramatics and heart-stopping football plays, stay for the soothing wisdom and kindness of Coach Taylor and his wife Tami. — A.H. 

How to watch: Friday Night Lights Seasons 1-5 are now streaming on Hulu.

Whaaatever it takes, I know I can make it through!

Whaaatever it takes, I know I can make it through!

I’ve said it once, and I’ll say it again: Degrassi: The Next Generation holds up! Of course, we deal with the show’s many taboo topics in different ways now — but that doesn’t make watching them unfold any less addicting. With 14 seasons to its name, this show begs to be watched until you are physically, mentally, and emotionally exhausted. Like actual high school, it’s one soap opera that just won’t end. Unlike actual high school, you won’t want it to! 

How to watch: Degrassi: The Next Generation Seasons 1-14 are now streaming free on Tubi

"Welcome to your tape."

“Welcome to your tape.”

Image: Beth Dubber/Netflix

Netflix’s 13 Reasons Why made some seriously problematic decisions in its first two seasons, but by its third installment, things are somewhat better. The students, teachers, and parents at Liberty High School become entangled in the investigation of Bryce Walker’s murder — and while that’s not exactly enjoyable, it is whole-heartedly bananas and pretty watchable. YMMV.

How to watch: 13 Reasons Why Seasons 1-3 are now streaming on Netflix.

"The only person worse at being a vampire than me is you."

“The only person worse at being a vampire than me is you.”

Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior The Vampire Diaries? Set in the spooky town of Mystical Falls, the story of Elena Gilbert and her 162-year-old vampire boyfriend is as sexy and fun as it is confusing and stressful. You’ve got loves lost, loves resurrected, Ian Somerhalder, shirtless, and plot holes like you wouldn’t believe. Obviously, we stan.

How to watch: The Vampire Diaries Seasons 1-8 are now streaming on Netflix.

"Birds can do it, we can do it, let's stop talking. Let's get to it. Let's fall in love."

“Birds can do it, we can do it, let’s stop talking. Let’s get to it. Let’s fall in love.”

Shailene Woodley’s breakout role in The Secret Life of the American Teenager dominated ABC Family from 2008 to 2013 — and what a magical few years those were. We saw her character Amy grapple with an unplanned pregnancy. Then, single motherhood and a painful love triangle. Then, another unplanned pregnancy from what turned out to be more like a love pentagon? Oh, and she had to stop playing the French horn. That was a bummer. 

How to watch: The Secret Life of the American Teenager Seasons 1-5 are now streaming on Hulu

Hey, Upper East Siders.

Hey, Upper East Siders.

Few worlds have captured our attention like the juicy surveillance state of Gossip Girl. Pitting best friends Serena van der Woodsen and Blair Waldorf against each other, the conniving, anonymous blogger known as “Gossip Girl” aimed to take down the elite world of Manhattan boarding school one scandal at a time. Come for the histrionics, stay for the bedazzled headbands. XOXO.

How to watch: Gossip Girl Seasons 1-6 are now streaming on Netflix

Love, A

Love, A

Sadly, the always iconic Pretty Little Liars is unavailable for streaming right now. (If you’ve got extra cash, definitely rent or purchase the whole thing. It’s sensational.) What we do have is PLL‘s short-lived spinoff The Perfectionists. Based on another novel by Sara Shepard, this show brings Alison, Mona, and plenty of that killer flair to a college campus with dark secrets. Hooray! 

How to watch: Pretty Little Liars: The Perfectionists Season 1 is now streaming on Hulu

Double, double, toil, and trouble...

Double, double, toil, and trouble…

Image: Diyah Pera/Netflix

Netflix’s take on everyone’s favorite teenage witch is battier than most. Yes, you’ve got normal coming-of-age questions like, “Should Sabrina sign her name in the Book of the Beast and relinquish her mortal ways?” But you’ve also got darker questions like, “Is it wrong to catfish and then torture human boys because the patriarchy sucks?” It’s all about choices in Greendale! 

How to watch: Chilling Adventures of Sabrina Season 1-3 are now streaming on Netflix

God bless Ben Platt.

God bless Ben Platt.

The Politician is basically West Wing, if West Wing took place at a Santa Barbara high school with no adult supervision, an endless fountain of cash, and the logic of an acid trip. For Season 1, Payton Hobart (Ben Platt), the series’ leading antihero, must face the obstacles between him and the title of Student Body President. In this case, those include: a murder scandal, a sex scandal, a scandal scandal, and a surprisingly steamy confrontation with Jessica Lange. 

How to watch: The Politician Season 1 is now streaming on Netflix

Regular boarding school stuff, but also... murder?

Regular boarding school stuff, but also… murder?

If you aren’t watching Elite, then you don’t even know what teen drama is yet. This Spanish language thriller tackles murder, love triangles, and other fun stuff with unprecedented tenacity. Even better, it’s acted and written so well you’ll buy most of what it’s selling. Told in a non-linear fashion, you’ll always be dying to know what happens next at Las Encinas. 

How to watch: Elite Seasons 1-3 are now streaming on Netflix.

Calling all Gleeks.

Calling all Gleeks.

Ryan Murphy’s seminal musical dramedy Glee started as an underdog tale of some kids who loved to sing, banding together with an in-over-his-head teacher to overcome a super mean cheerleading coach. By the show’s end, a gas leak had everyone believing they were Muppets, multiple characters threatened to riot over a lack of tater tots in the cafeteria, and Jesus visited students by taking the form of a grilled cheese sandwich. And that’s what you missed on Glee

How to watch: Glee Seasons 1-6 are now streaming on Netflix

"I'm in the mood for chaos."

“I’m in the mood for chaos.”

Image: Dean Buscher/The CW

Taking unspeakable liberties with the Archie comics, Riverdale offers the best of the best in ludicrous teen antics. Sure, the series starts relatively normal — girls trying out for the cheerleading squad, guys mustering up the courage to quit football, a red-haired queen bee hunting for the killer behind her brother’s drowning, etc. But check in with Riverdale High lately, and you’ll be hard pressed to find anything like that. Now, if you’re looking for say, I don’t know, an organ-stealing cult with a bear attack subplot? Riverdale is where you belong. 

How to watch: Riverdale Seasons 1-3 are now streaming on Netflix

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