‘Stranger Things 3’ made me want to break up with my Jim Hopper crush

Warning: This post contains mild plot spoilers about Stranger Things 3.

Stranger Things 3 is being largely hailed as a triumph. It jumpstarted the narrative, gave some much-needed credit to its female characters, and is generally just a good ol’ time (except for the Flayed, R.I.P.). 

But there’s one baffling gap, and that’s Jim Hopper’s terrifying anger management issues that build to a boiling point from the season’s very opening. Hopper is a rage monster almost as volatile as the Mind Flayer, and it’s not okay.

As played by David Harbour, Hawkins chief of police Jim Hopper won over fans as early as the series’ August 2016 debut. He was perceptive and sardonic, the perfect leader in our search for the vanished Will Byers, and a comforting presence as we hid under the covers and the Demogorgon drew close.

In Season 2, Hopper made the tricky transition from Dad to Daddy, often embodying both at the same time (“Hopper: Dad or Daddy?” is a real poll Harbour put on his Twitter in 2017 and promptly deleted but we’ve never stopped thinking about). He became Eleven’s father figure, and before Season 3, officially her father. He did a little dance and became the internet’s comfort, an unproblematic male figure even in a show set during an era of toxic masculinity.

All of that makes the Season 3 pivot more painful and inexplicable. This was a character who, over the course of two seasons, let himself care about and get close to people again after the devastating loss of his daughter. It makes sense for him to instinctively close off or struggle with emotional intimacy, but Stranger Things 3 introduced us to a man who, in the year-plus since we last saw him, is a walking time bomb of violent rage.

First he takes it out on El and Mike, shouting about the three-inch door rule when the door was, in fact, open (what Hopper really wants is at least three inches of space between El and Mike at all times, yet it never occurs to him to ratify the rule in this way). El cheekily shuts it with telekinesis (kids these days!), and overall, the scene plays well.

What surprised me as the season moved forward was that this was not a humorous one-off scene, but an entire episode arc that goes on to define Hopper’s character for the season. He’s so furious about El and Mike – two teenagers who are openly dating and presumably kissing – that he vents to Joyce. Instead of taking the rational advice she provides as an experienced parent, he lies to Mike just to get him out of the house and then intimidates the boy, leading to El and Mike’s ultimately useless breakup arc.

Beyond unnecessarily overbearing parenting, Hopper’s anger carries into his relationship with Joyce, which is a critical area of personal growth for them both. When she stands him up for dinner – which was rude, sure – he fixates on it deeply. When she tells him about the mysterious magnets, something that should sound the alarm for a man who was once almost asphyxiated by sentient shadow vines, all he hears is that she went to see the middle school science teacher and that this is somehow a threat. 

The interaction is written off as funny, even cute. Hop is jealous; they mutually agreed it wasn’t a date, but he clearly had other plans. He’s also visibly drunk from dinner onward (you don’t have to be a lightweight to feel a double scotch and an entire bottle of wine), a fact that is not only dismissed but all together ignored.

From that point on, Hopper’s irrational jealousy is almost always played for laughs. When he’s not bringing up the failed dinner date or Mr. Clarke, he’s conceded to helping Joyce solve the magnet mystery that leads them to the Russians. He physically assaults the mayor with minimal provocation, including almost cutting off his finger. Mayor Kline may be a corrupt slimeball, but he comes out of that scene looking a lot better than the police chief who just beat the shit out of the mayor.

At around this same time in the series, I ceased to see Hopper as either dad or daddy. His physical stature and position of authority, both of which were once sources of comfort, suddenly felt threatening. I started to fear for Joyce anytime they were in conversation or close proximity. I yelped audibly when he kicked open El’s door, something to which she and Max bafflingly have no reaction. I remembered that this man could snap me in two, and in the show’s universe all it would take for him to try, apparently. is a sassy comment or toe out of line.

During scenes with Russian hostage Alexei, Hopper is belligerent bordering on unhinged, barely able to keep it together while Joyce and Murray try to create an actual dialogue with their captive to learn about his work with the gate. Hopper throws Alexei bodily to the ground even though the Russian poses no physical threat, and he’s always just one snap away from unleashing a verbal tirade against Joyce or Murray when they try to talk sense.

This is the second time in 2018 that I’ve witnessed a beloved TV show participate in character assassination to the point of gaslighting its audience. When the show and its characters don’t reckon with such a drastic change, loyal viewers start to question themselves. Was Hop always like this? Was I watching the right show? Is it just funny? Was the Mad Queen sufficiently pre-written? No!!

If you’ve seen the season finale – we won’t spoil it – you know that Hopper’s rage is never addressed, and probably never will be. It has gone to the place where we keep Billy’s racism and Max’s domestic abuse, the Stranger Things Upside Down where unpleasantness goes to sit quietly in the shadows. Stranger Things 3 could have used Hopper to craft a nuanced narrative about anger and masculinity, but that has never been the Stranger Things way. 

It’s tough to break up with a fictional character, particularly with where his arc ends up, but it would be far worse for fans to complacently accept this portrayal without noting what the character did right and wrong. In the end, El learns a lot from her surrogate dad, and we can, too – even if it’s about how not to act.

Stranger Things 3 is now streaming on Netflix.