The best food for your “Game of Thrones” premiere party

Following is a transcript of the video.

Kim: Today we picked up the official “Game of Thrones” companion cookbook for the show because who doesn’t want to throw a big party for your friends every Sunday when you’re watching the show, and we’re gonna try and make some of the best dishes out of here.

All the ones that are really iconic, I mean, everybody knows about the pigeon pie that Joffrey eats at his wedding, or a nice Winterfell breakfast.

So all those tasty dishes we are gonna put together and then have a big party for our friends because that’s what “Game of Thrones” fans love to do.

Oh, yeah.

It specifically says that it’s “incredibly authentic tasting,” and I think that that means kind of dense, not great bread that people were eating in medieval times before everybody figured out how to make much more tastier bread. I’m fine with that. I’m all about the authentic “Game of Thrones” food experience here, you know?

I feel like I could very easily kill a man with just this very brick of bread.

I don’t know if Mary Berry would call it a good bake, but I think I did my best.

So the Purple Wedding, everybody knows by that nickname. But the real fun part of that is when Joffrey takes a big old bite of his pigeon pie and promptly chokes on it to death, and it’s really satisfying. Really the poison was in the wine, but the pie is the impetus for everything because he starts to cough after he takes a bite of pie, and then he gets his wine, and the wine has poison in it. We are not poisoning our friends at our “Game of Thrones” dinner party, but we are going to serve them a delicious version of pie.

Joffrey Baratheon: Mmm, good.

Kim: Our pigeon pie today is not going to have pigeon. I am from New York City. I have a great respect for pigeons. We are feeding them chicken pie instead. Pigeons are like medieval chickens that are just grosser.

Shae: Lemon cakes?

Sansa: No, thank you. Shae: You love lemon cakes.

Kim: She actually mentions lemon cakes so many times in the books that it’s become kind of a running joke that all Sansa ever wants is a lemon cake.

We actually went with a vegan version because we didn’t feel like cutting up a bunch of random animals and putting them into a stew, so we have a mushroom-based Bowl o’ Brown. This is the dish that Gendry and Davos actually bond over when they’re having a little one-on-one time in the dungeon of Dragonstone and they both reminisce about eating their Bowls o’ Brown.

Davos Seaworth: When you get to Flea Bottom, have a Bowl o’ Brown for me.

Tyrion Lannister: And bacon, burned black.

Kim: You can’t live in Westeros without being drunk basically from morning till night.

And Cersei Lannister, of course, loves her wine.